Nerves

Many people have asked me if I was nervous about surgery.  Right now I am sitting in a room waiting to be preped for surgery and I can say that I am really not nervous.  I never get nervous for any surgery until right before I fall asleep.  After I am under I have no control and those hours are lost to me.  I have no recollection of what happened.  That is both a blessing and a curse.  Blessing because I didn't have to endure pain during the surgery but a curse because I have no clue what happened to me until I am told.  For example, after one of my surgeries the doctor dropped my top palet on the OR floor.  It broke into two pieces and the surgery was prolonged because it needed to be repaired.  I had absolutely no clue that had happened until my mom told me why I had so much stuff in my mouth.  I wonder how I would have reacted if I knew about it while it was happening...  In any case, I sometimes wish I could both stay aware but fall asleep. 


I hope you all enjoy your St. Patricks Day!!!